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Archive for May, 2009

A Quick Update

It has been 6 months since I left Dish Network. I have a job now with Roanoke City Schools as a Special Educator which is awesome, but it is a non-renewing position. So I really have to impress them to be offered the position next year. I am still woefully single but am trying to get over the “need” to be taking care of someone in a relationship.
Brandon had been telling me since we broke up that there was a chance we would get back together and that he had been thinking about it. Well, a couple of weeks ago, he met a chick online and now they are dating & he is “in love.” yay. Fuck. Well, it actually felt like a breakup all over again. I know we had been apart for a while, but we talked everyday, texted all day and still considered each other our best friends. Then, whammo. Literally the day he started seeing her he cut off all contact with me, while telling me we were still friends, he just didn’t have time now that he was with someone. So… when he’s with me, not having time for his friends was unacceptable, but when he’s with her it’s perfectly natural? I’m confused. Ah double standards and the men who have them. Suck my… (insert witty bodily humor here)
Happily, I have found a song that really does my heart good. It’s amazing that I had discounted how much I missed music & how much it can do for one’s psyche. Now that I am back to singing and playing everyday, I feel more at peace with my surroundings and myself. The song I have fallen in love with is “No Man” by Nina Storey. Yeah, it’s a little man-bashing but I need that right now. To prove to myself that I don’t need him, or want him, or any man for that matter. I did meet a chick I really like, but that is another story. Some of my close friends and a couple of my family members know that I am bisexual, but the rest… I’m not so sure that they would be able to handle it. Bringing home a lovely woman probably wouldn’t be such a nice thing to do to them. But she is really nice & quite attractive.
Oh who the hell knows anymore! My life is looking positive for the first time in months, so I just know I’m not going to screw it up by making some course-altering decision about which I am not 100% sure.
Hopefully everyone else is doing great out there in cyberland. Take care & blessed be!
Heather

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